Highlight of the day was a baboon watching us whilst idly masturbating, then picking his bell-end and eating it.

Your sister's ex sounds like a right tosser. No present for his daughter on Christmas day? I'm speechless. I bet even Hitler wouldn't do that.

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It's political correctness gone mad!

I remember going to Woburn Safari quite often, as it was round the corner from where I lived. My dad would drive us through in the old Vauxhall Viva. (BTW I think you didn't make it clear enough to those not in the know that one drives through Woburn in one's own car.) I remember though that I wasn't that impressed by the animals and was more interested in the concept of cattle grids.

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<ni> komet: You are functionally illiterate as regards trashy erotica.

Was walking in the zoo when I saw in the distance 2 dog like creatures. One was obviously flat, because the other was pumping it up like there was no tomorrow.

Looked at the sign - African Mountain Dogs.

Heh.

CHeers
Creo.

"I shall do what I believe to be right and honourable" - Guderian

They just lack in the social niceties department. You'll have to forgive them. After all, they grew up in the woods. Er, on the plains. Something like that.

Make sure you get some ice cream if you end up going to a museum. Kids love ice cream. Almost as much as WAGGY DOES!

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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.

And it's quite possible that there isn't.*

Then it's possible that a hateful and petty but present dad is worse. And much to my shame, this is the situation that I left my niece to 3 months before she was born, because I couldn't take the pressure of being made to spend most of my free time in the presence of his disapproving glare, because of the emotional blackmail my sister put me through to get me there to make her life slightly interesting, but actually eclipsing my own existence, and normally having guests round who weren't speaking English.

Up to a point, my niece has an indomitable spirit which comes from my sister, who seems to survive in the situation, and her father (I wrote 'dad', but I got a distinctly dirty yet pleading look from my sister last time I let that foul word slip out last time I visited their house), who is nothing if not stubborn, and indeed is almost nothing apart from that. While her male cousin of the same age (and if I were to have a favourite, it would be him) was a boisterous two year old who had yet to learn the value of pronouncing the second syllable of a word, my niece was producing perfectly enunciated words and sentences in both her native languages, and she can do this over the phone, too, while her older cousins don't yet stand still long enough to be pinned down by the handset.

However, given that she lives in a much loved previous home of mine and is in the church community where I felt I belonged until I was eclipsed by my brother-in-law's devotion to making himself look good by being helpful without concerning himself about whether it was useful, merely making it apparent how hard he had worked to do whatever he was doing (he does have pretty phenominal (though generally overrated) stamina, too), I have plenty of friends who talk to and play with her when she's at church (which is more or less the only place she goes out), so I know she's got some outlet in real life. Also, the state actually has enough programs that reach out to her (she's in a SureStart area), so there are stimuli.

Anyway, what I think I was saying was that it would be fun to take my niece to a Safari Park, but without her dad there.

And would it have been better with straight bison?

*Obvious caveats about natural disasters, etc, apply.

Which Zoo?

--- Thad ---
developer of ... ?